i know wholeheartedly that i am better in numerous ways because i no longer live here but i severely miss the familiarity of it all.

i bought a diana f+ in late december 2012. i shot with it in early 2013 + somehow it’s now almost late 2014 + i have one last photo to shoot on that first roll of film. i am certain that the photos i’ve shot are not nearly as lovely as the ones other lomo photographers post on the internet so i’ve become afraid to shoot that final photo + get the film developed. i’m also aware this is a stupid fear + that it’s my first roll with a camera i’m inexperienced with + that there is obviously a learning curve involved.
running my own arts based business for almost a decade has changed the way i make art. i am thinking way too much about how other people will view it, that’s what i had to think about as a fashion designer because the goal was to sell.
i bought that diana in an attempt to shoot more photos, just like all the other cameras + camera accessories i’ve bought in the last 5 years. i’m really not following through on that very well.
i need to shoot that last photo already.


my house plants are thriving + the leaves left behind from the succulents i accidentally killed are making new pups. this makes me inexplicably happy + makes me feel like a capable adult. i am keeping living things alive! responsibility… or something like that.

things i’d like to do (in the near future):
-dye my hair pale pink
-finish all started embroidery based art projects + list them on etsy
-keep a concise blog about aforementioned art projects
-take photos of things i like in ptbo
-make more clothing for myself

things i will probably do instead:
-play animal crossing city folk
-look at tumblr + instagram
-bake cookies

i actually love cleaning controllers at work, especially the ones for playstation 3. each one is proof that humans are filthy + don’t take care of their belongings but i find it incredibly satisfying to scrap all that junk out of the seams in the plastic + make them clean + buyable. i could literally clean controllers for hours + be super pleased about it.

inexplicably, mario kart + most other racing games have become really stressful for me to play.
does this mean i’m getting old/do you realize how much my boyfriend loves video games that involve driving?

yesterday, at work:

i’m behind the counter pulling video games (a.k.a: removing them from their cases to file them so they are not stolen/damaged on the floor) + suddenly there is a little girl in front of me, sizing me up.
i say: “hello.”
she says (very seriously): “do you like spider-man?”
due to the manner in which she asked this question, i assume she likes spider-man so i say: “he’s pretty good, do you like spider-man?”
and she replies: “no! i like skylanders!”

kids ask me trick questions all the time.

i keep meaning to better document my life, to write things down that i’ll probably forget later. i’ve been meaning to do this for a couple of decades. i’m not entirely sure what is worth remembering half the time but i also feel like i live an existence worth writing about most days. i mean, scott + i spent a couple of hours sorting his childhood lego by colour last night in order to make our lego use more efficient. who wouldn’t want to read about that?

write, more. right, more?
make, believe.

a list of small things in my immediate future to look forward to:
-looking at apartments
-the drive to pontypool
-hearing that heartbeat again after so many days without it
-local musicians on stage on a saturday night
-home made kombucha tea

life lessons (brought to me by the month of june):

full time jobs are almost always too good to be true. jobs offered to you over the phone are definitely too good to be true.

when you are a student with no credit and no job, people are far more willing to take a chance on you than when you are 31 with no credit and no job.

soccer is even more boring/irritating/pointless to watch than i remember.